Why do ballerinas stand on their toes? …
November 18, 2008
Why do ballerinas stand on their toes? …
Why do ballerinas stand on their toes?
Can’t they just get taller women?
Source: jokesareawesome.com
- : 3.3
The tale of a flight crew
November 18, 2008
The tale of a flight crew
Image via Wikipedia This is an actual incident, which has been hidden from the world press so far. Its all over the internet now… Written by To The Point News Friday, 16 May 2008 The brand spanking new Airbus 340-600, the largest passenger airplane ever built, sat in its hangar in Toulouse, France without a single hour of [...]
This is an actual incident, which has been hidden from the world press so far. Its all over the internet now…
Written by To The Point News
Friday, 16 May 2008
The brand spanking new Airbus 340-600, the largest passenger airplane ever built, sat in its hangar in Toulouse, France without a single hour of airtime. Enter the Arab flight crew of Abu Dhabi Aircraft Technologies (ADAT) on November 15, 2007 to conduct pre-delivery tests on the ground, such as engine run-ups, prior to delivery to Etihad Airways in Abu Dhabi.
The ADAT crew taxied the A340-600 to the run-up area. Then they took all four engines to 
takeoff power with a virtually empty aircraft. Not having read the run-up manuals, they had no clue just how light an empty A340-600 really is.
The takeoff warning horn was blaring away in the cockpit because they had all 4 engines at full power. The aircraft computers thought they were trying to takeoff but it had not been configured properly (flaps/slats, etc.) Then one of the ADAT crew decided to pull the circuit breaker on the Ground Proximity Sensor to silence the alarm.
This fools the aircraft into thinking it is in the air.
The computers automatically released all the brakes and set the aircraft rocketing forward. The ADAT crew had no idea that this is a safety feature so that pilots can’t land with the brakes on.
Not one member of the seven-man Arab crew was smart enough to throttle back the engines from their max power20setting, so the $200 million brand-new aircraft crashed into a blast barrier, totaling it.
The extent of injuries to the crew is unknown, for there has been a news blackout in the major media in France and elsewhere. Coverage of the story was deemed insulting to Moslem Arabs. Finally, the photos are starting to leak out.
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Source: treebeard31.wordpress.com
- : 3.7
Blonde Suicide - Mon, 17 Nov 2008
November 17, 2008
Blonde Suicide - Mon, 17 Nov 2008
Q: How do you kill a blonde? A: Put a spike on her shoulder.
Source: www.comedy.com
- : 3.2
Time For A Comparison - Mon, 10 Nov 2008
November 17, 2008
Time For A Comparison - Mon, 10 Nov 2008
Q: What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb? A: You can unscrew a lightbulb!
Source: www.comedy.com
- : 3.5
Q: What did the Irish farmer say to his…
November 17, 2008
Q: What did the Irish farmer say to his…
Q: What did the Irish farmer say to his cow when it climbed onto the roof of his barn?
A: Get off.
Source: jokesareawesome.com
- : 3.0
Daughter Dilemma - Fri, 14 Nov 2008
November 17, 2008
Daughter Dilemma - Fri, 14 Nov 2008
There was a brunette, a redhead and a blonde - each with a daughter.
The brunette went into her daughter’s room one day and found some cigarettes. She exclaimed, “Oh! She smokes?”
The redhead went into her daughter’s room that same day and found some marijuana. “Oh..She smokes,” she sighed.
That very same day the blonde went into her daughter’s room and found a condom, only to comment, “Oh..I guess my daughter has a penis.”
Source: www.comedy.com
- : 2.8
What do you call a sheep covered in cho…
November 17, 2008
What do you call a sheep covered in cho…
What do you call a sheep covered in chocolate?
A chocolate BAA
Source: jokesareawesome.com
- : 2.8
At Sydney University, there were four students taking Organic Chemistry. …
November 16, 2008
At Sydney University, there were four students taking Organic Chemistry. …
At Sydney University, there were four students taking Organic Chemistry. They did so well on all the quizzes, midterms and labs, etc., that each had an "A" so far for the semester. These four friends were so confident with the finals approaching that the weekend before, they decided to go down to Canberra and party with some friends there.
They had a great time. However, after all the hard partying, they slept all day Sunday and didn't make it back to Sydney until early Monday morning - the morning of their final exam! Rather than taking the final then, they decided to find their professor after the exam and explain to him why they missed it.
They explained that they had gone to Canberra to do some research in the ANU (Australian National University) archives for the weekend with the plan to come back in time to study, but, unfortunately, they had a flat tire on the way back, didn't have a spare, and couldn't get help for a long time. As a result, they only just arrived now!
The professor thought it over and then agreed they could make up their final exam the following day. The guys were elated and relieved. They studied hard that night - all night - and went in the next day at the time the professor had told them.
He placed them in separate rooms and handed each of them a test booklet, (which was out of 100 points) and told them to begin. The first problem was worth five points. It was something simple about free radical formation. Cool, they all thought in their separate rooms, "this is going to be easy."
Each finished the problem and then turned the page. Question 2 (for 95 points): Which tire?
Source: jokes4all.net
- : 3.2
Jesus Christ is dying on the cross, his…
November 16, 2008
Jesus Christ is dying on the cross, his…
Jesus Christ is dying on the cross, his disciples are gathered around, crying. Peter looks up and notices that Jesus seems to be calling him, “Peter, come hither!” Immediately Peter rushes over to the cross, only to be hit severely over the head by the roman guard. He gets on his feet again and wants to return to the other disciples when he hears Jesus calling again, “Peter, come hither!” So, again Peter tries to climb the cross to get to his lord, when the roman soldier draws his sword and chops Peter’s arm off. Peter is getting a little pissed and wants to go back to his buddies, but again Jesus summons. The roman guard can’t believe that Peter is trying yet AGAIN to climb to the cross, and chops off another arm. Peter is now covered in blood and demented from the blow to the head and wants to call it a day. Jesus hoarsly croaks, “Peter, please, come to me!” By now, the roman gurad is tired of chopping limbs, so he lets Peter be. The faithful disciple struggles to climb the cross (without arms mind you) and after a long while he finally arrives at his Lord’s side. Hurting, suffering, bleeding, Peter looks into his Master’s eyes and asks, “yes, my Lord. What is it?” Jesus smiles lovingly and looks off into the distance as a weak smile plays across his face, “Look Peter, I can see your house from here!”
Source: jokesareawesome.com
- : 3.1
Talking Clock
November 16, 2008
Talking Clock
While proudly showing off his new apartment to friends, a college student led the way into the den.
“What is the big brass gong and hammer for?” one of his friends asked.
“That is the talking clock,” the student replied.
“How’s it work?” the friend asked.
“Watch,” said the student, who then proceeded to give the gong an ear-shattering hit with the hammer.
Suddenly someone screamed from the other side of the wall, “KNOCK IT OFF, YOU IDIOT! It’s 2:30 in the morning!”
Source: www.lowcomdom.com
- : 2.7
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